In a decision that upset many who believe that there are ethical and religious reasons not to participate in the cloning of any of God’s creatures, the FDA has said meat from cloned animals is safe to eat. At some level I agree with them, but anyone who has ever seen cattle breeding knows that something went horribly wrong years ago. Prior to cloning, there are only two ways to increase your inventory of livestock—neither of them pretty.

The first is perhaps the most natural way, allow the beasts to procreate on their own. This doesn’t always work, and even when it does…anyone who has seen it will attest that it basically amounts to bovine rape. The female creature tries to escape while the male essentially tackles her and has his way. Once he’s completed the act, he wanders away and may never acknowledge the cow or his offspring again.

The second method is no less shocking, but removes much of the trauma and risk of damage to the female. Basically semen is manually extracted from a bull and then, using a gloved hand, is inserted into the female.

Now, I’m not one to vary from God’s plan…but I’d prefer my children never learn of either traditional method of cattle breeding. Given the choice, I’d much prefer to abolish both styles of impregnation in favor of the painless and morally preferable method of cloning.