A Jacksonville man grabbed his shotgun and raced to help his just-shot neighbor only to be rewarded by losing his job for brandishing a firearm. This is what happens when homosexuals make corporate policy, folks. It’s time we start rewarding those brave enough to brandish their weapons, not take away their living. Do you really want to make the guy with the shotgun mad, hippies?

“I was expecting work to give me some kind of commendation,” said Bruley, 24. “I was totally blown back. It was a crisis that most people don’t go through.”